Sunday, April 11, 2010

Love and Be Loved

This mooring ... yes, the word typed itself as I tried to type the word "morning", secretly slipping in the extra "o" in place of the "n". But even a typo has something to offer when we are open to this infinite expanse of divine meaning and mysterious purpose we co-exist in. The dictionary describes the word "mooring" as: "a tract of open, rolling wasteland, usually covered with heather and often marshy' ... hmmmm ... A second definition is: "to secure a ship to a pier or buoy." Or "a place where a ship is moored." This is what it feels like when Eternal Vastness begins to make Itself felt ... somewhat like mooring a boat to shore after a sojourn in the cosmic ocean.
And even in our mistakes we can uncover a hidden truth.
So let's try again:
This morning as I sat outside and breathed in, I felt the gentle tug to soften, open up and listen ... this is what I heard:

I am new to the path.
I don't know.
I really don't know a thing.
I invite You to open me up
to what is true
right now.
Where I am right now ...
this step here ...
is true and real ... just so.
You brought me this far...
You brought me to This.
My heart is grateful
My mind is empty
And ... I don't know.
What if this is it?
Just as it is.
Not the next step
But this one.
What if I dared to stop ...
look ... listen ...
Open up to This ...
To You.
Just here?
If I dare to pull back enough
and not follow my mind's
impulse to know,
I can simply breathe and be happy.
Not in knowing anything
in particular.
But in simply knowing
that here, in This
I am always already happy.
If this breath is
all I have ...
this one breath, this breath
being breathed right now ...
If this is true
If this is so
then this is the
only place I can ever find you.
So, what could possibly
be better, purer, clearer,
more available and
more real
than this ... this moment
Why would I even look
to the next
That next breath is not ...
This breath is.
Do I dare
to meet You here?
This can be done,
this must be done.
But do I dare
do it now?
Don't go past it.
Don't ignore it.
Don't even seek it.
It's much closer than all of that.
You'll never find it ...
not until
this point,
this breath, this moment,
is embraced by
your "not knowing a thing about it".
This is how willing ...
how open you have to be.
The embrace is a
stripping back ...
an emptying of anything and everything ...
what remains is This.
A single breath
A single look
A single transparent
unified touch ...
A you/me moment
that is simply this:
No you, no me
Only This.
So, I am new to the path
I don't know a thing.
Yet I thrill to your embrace ... this embrace of Not Knowing.
My heart quivers
in response to the
gift of Your touch.
As I feel it
I simply allow ...
open up further and allow.
Let Heaven swallow
me up whole.
What is left?
The sun rises ...
the sun shines ...
the crow caws ...
the traffic whistles and hums ...
the bamboo sways in rhythm with the breeze ...
a dove coos ...
a jet rumbles
sweetly overhead.
The world is alive
and it sings to this
moment ...
as this moment.
Do I dare to "step in step"
and meet It ...
be met by It ...
Be swept up in Its embrace?
The sun's rays fully appear
as I ask this question ...
In response,
it bathes my face in its warmth.
My heart simply feels ...
feels what?
Yes, it's true:
God's love.
And I can say it
because my heart whispers it to me.
In not knowing a thing
I know only this:
God loves.
It's the gift that each
moment brings ...
Stop ... feel ... look ...
This is God's love.
Embrace It and be embraced ...
My pen stops ... waiting in silence and stillness ...
listening for the next word to drop in ...
The pen simply meets the page trusting the next word will arrive as it does ...
In not knowing, I can trust ... relax ...
listen ...
watch for ...
allow for
the sweet embrace
to be appreciated completely
in this moment.
Love and be loved.
After I write these words I seamlessly move into my day. I open a package that's just arrived. It's a book for review for our newspaper Innerself from one of our columnists. I tear open the envelope, open the book and the very first words that greet me are from Kabir:
"Behold but One in all things;
it is the second that leads you astray."

1 comment:

David said...

I was reading this stream of consciousness and it entered my stream of consciousness, then there was this notion,

I know this...
But I don't know this.

I am of this moment...
As are You.

You are me...
But you are not me.

We must be One.
and of the One!

If we both draw from the One...
It doesn't matter who we are,
what we are,
where we are,
when we are,
how we are,
...this is!

Thanks Leo!

Slow sweet air rising,
You turn into the Fall wind,
What bird have you become?
Br. Lawrence